The Apparent Necessity of My Being "Saved"

Hello there. If you are a religious person, I want to tell you now that this may offend you. That is not my intention, of course, but it is something I recognize all the same. These are my opinions, and not an attack or declaration that my way is the best way.

That being said, I’ve noticed a strange phenomenon the last few months. All of a sudden, I keep getting these customers who feel the need to tell me, upon my handing them their receipt and telling them to have a nice day, that Jesus loves me. Not only that, but yesterday I was additionally told that He has a plan for my life. I appreciated the irony of that statement coming from a woman on crutches to the part-time employee who was using the register under someone else’s numbers because her transfer had, yet again, failed to go through without a hitch.

However, I’m starting to get a little concerned. Why do these people all of a sudden feel the need to thrust upon me the “reality” of God’s love? Do I look like I’m contemplating suicide? I’m not. Do I look like I run about naked sacrificing animals to some heathen god or the devil? I don’t. As far as I knew I was just a boring cashier who smiles and runs credit cards for part time while I’m pursuing my glorious Creative Writing degree–with which, many people think, I will be doing nothing but living in a fabulous cardboard box in the city.

It’s not that I don’t appreciate the kind sentiment that these people are trying to offer. But frankly, I get a little offended. First of all, where do they get off assuming I’m the sort of person who needs this kind of reminder? Do I wear a button that says “I do not go to church. I am not in fact affiliated with any religious body except the musings in my own brain?” I don’t think I do (unless someone is taping signs to my back). Secondly, where do they get off assuming I want to be “saved”?

There is, apparently, a Christian notion that in order to be a good Christian one must gallivant about thrusting pamphlets about Christianity into people’s hands and giving out Bible verses at Halloween. A friend of mine, who occasionally attends a church at which one of my former coworkers is a pastor, was telling me how he gave a sermon about the immorality of not trying to spread the word of God. So, apparently, it’s immoral to not go around trying to tell other people how to live. Apparently, a good person has to get up in other people’s personal business (there is a part two to this that I like to call my “Why Is It Your Business?” rant on gay marriage, but I’ll save that for another day).

I understand that these people think they are helping by spreading the Word of God. They feel that they are saving people from eternal damnation and rotting in the guts of Hell and all that. But quite honestly, it’s just a little annoying.

If I were to ASK you about your Christianity then yes, please do tell me about it. But if I’m standing there minding my own business there’s really no reason to insist that I Find God. How do you know I haven’t? Just because I don’t sit in a building once a week chanting along with a group doesn’t mean I don’t have my own talks with God. I’m not saying I do. I’m not saying I don’t. I’m just saying, people get entirely too worked up and blind-sighted about religion. The “My way is the best way, the ONLY way” philosophy is ridiculous. Let’s see the proof, people! Go on, die and then come back and let me know what happens. Then, perhaps, I’ll settle down and pick a religion and say that I know what happens when we die.

The moral of the story, I think, is this: Mind your own business. There’s nothing wrong with “have a nice day” or even “Jesus loves you”, if you must, but don’t go making grand assumptions about other people’s lives and trying to fix them–with religion or otherwise. Help those who have proven to need help, help those who ask for help… but don’t go telling cashiers that Jesus has a plan for their lives and hobbling off into the night on your crutches feeling like you’ve affected anything other than irritating her into a blog post about minding your own business.

Having had my piece, I invite you to debate me–intelligently–about anything I have said herein. That being said, I will not respond to unintelligent or offensive comments.


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